CELEBRITY
GAMING
MOVIESFor some, the Super Bowl is two weeks away. For most, the season is finally over and it’s time to start spending the millions. How do the great men of the NFL choose to unwind?
Brett Favre: Returns home to cheers, honors and rampant celebration despite the mind-blowingly bad pass call and subsequent loss. Quickly forgets about the five wide-open yards that could have been easily covered for prime field-goal setup. Kisses babies, signs breasts, resumes regular float-riding in Minneapolis’s bi-weekly “We Love Brett Favre” parade. Retires. Discovers cure for cancer. Brokers multi-national peace agreement in the Middle East. Appears at meetings of the Favropalian Knights, a long-established secret society that values only cheese production, indecision and endless worship of Brett Favre. Decides he’s just not ready to leave the field and starts for the Cowboys in the fall.
Eli Manning: Tries to re-establish himself as King-Pimp of Hoboken. Spends five hours a day walking up and down Washington Street while saying loudly, “Yeah, dat’s how I roll. Dat’s how I roll cause dat’s how I gotta roll.” Asks hot wife to dress like a hooker and accompany him on strolls. Is bitch-smacked by hot wife. Gets laughed off the sidewalk and back into his automated condo. Cries, calls Peyton.
Nate Kaeding: Retreats to an Indian ashram for soul-searching, chakra-centering and media-avoiding. Encounters Taoist Apothecary Guru who also happens to be a Chargers fan. Is never heard from again.
In honor of the last game at Giants Stadium, the organization and team did nothing.
Fans hold up a sign that reads "Thanks for the Memories". They had no room to add "except for this one."
It has taken me a full week to digest the Giants’ Thanksgiving stink bomb laid in Denver. I am now ready to write about how Big Blew.
I’m writing a complaint letter to Wachovia. I will have no more of this “play of the game” decided with two minutes left when the game is still in the process of being blown. Plus, the play of the game was not the Boss TD that was played on the jumbotron, it was the coin toss that gave the Giants the ball first in OT.
The New York football Giants continued their shameless self-destruction in dramatic fashion by giving their Week 9 game to the San Diego Chargers. It’s not that the Giants don’t know how to win anymore, it’s that losing is just so much easier.
the next several weeks (until Big Blue blows someone out, or blows a game).I support paying Eli Manning like he’s some soccer star because hey, he won THE Superbowl Championship of all Superbowl Championships. Do you remember how undefeated those Patriots were? 
New York Giants – August 3 (rookies and veterans)
What They’re Saying: We have the best lines in the league. Losing to the Eagles couldn’t have been flukier.
Wish They’d Say: We’ve been watching video of Christian Okoye and throwing up constantly.
The Coach: Tom Coughlin was once called ‘The Devil Incarnate’ by his players in Jacksonville. It’s not outside the realm of possibility that he’d bite a player in the throat. Nevertheless, he toughens up your team. Hard to see him ever being on the hot seat again.
Best Case Scenario: The G-Men bulldoze through the NFC and get no real tests until a Super Bowl rematch against New England.
Worst Case Scenario: Brandon Jacobs gets injured, Eli doesn’t figure out how to throw to a receiver shorter than 6’5”, Coughlin swallows a planet.
