I missed the Jets Buffalo game. I would have picked buffalo. Honest.

Philadelphia -5.5 over ATLANTA

Neither one of these teams are any good. That’s why I think both will make the playoffs and one will make it to the Super Bowl. This league will be cruel to us, I promise.

INDIANAPOLIS -6.5 over Tennessee

I’m going the other direction only because EVERYONE is picking the Titans to at least cover. Confident Vince Young plus Chris Johnson is nearly unstoppable. But Manning wins these games. Especially this season.

KANSAS CITY +4.5 over Denver

All indications are that the Broncos are going to be fine, ax murdering the Giants on Thanksgiving. And they have lots of rest and the Chiefs are awful. But Denver, seriously, is 1-17 at Arrowhead in December. Like Shakira’s hips, the stats don’t lie.

New Orleans -9.5 over WASHINGTON

All indications are that the Redskins D is really good when Albert Haynesworth is out (excellent call, Danny). But in order to beat the Saints, you need to run. A lot. The Skins are down to their third option at running back. This ain’t happening.

PITTSBURGH over Oakland

I wish the Raiders were getting some points so I could take them. But in a straight pick’em? Dennis Dixon is really good, but the Steelers have a habit of not killing terrible teams this year. If they lose this one, their season is pretty much over. That would be nice.

Houston over JACKSONVILLE

Another pick? Have of these games are picks this weekend. Houston’s only prayer of getting anywhere near the playoffs and saving the job of their coach and quarterback is to win the games they’re supposed to. If they can stop ONE GUY, they can beat the Jags. That’s an if.

CINCINNATI -13 over Detroit

The Bengals kill bad teams (see Chicago) and have trouble with bad teams (see Cleveland twice). Which one is going to show up? I don’t think it’ll matter against the Lions, who are getting closer and closer to Ndamukong Suh. Who? Google that beast.

CAROLINA -6.5 over Tampa Bay

The Bucs are a rare team because they have no talent whatsoever, but if for some reason they can scrape together and get close to an upset, their coach will find a way to do something to ruin it. Someone get the man some high jeans and a stache.

CHICAGO -9 over St. Louis

The Bears are such a disaster that I almost took the points here. But that means I’m putting them in the hands of Kyle Boller. Been down that road. Hit every pothole and a Jetta.

San Diego -12.5 over CLEVELAND

Now I’m done.

Minnesota over ARIZONA

No points still? Can’t we get on with one of those 1-5 Favre games? And why does Adrian Peterson fumble so much? And are the Vikings the best team in history that isn’t being picked by anyone to make the Super Bowl?

San Francisco over SEATTLE

Alex Smith is on an audition to stop the Niners from looking at Sam Bradford. Meanwhile, Vernon Davis (TERP!) has become the best tight end in football. Maybe Singletary should throw Nate Clements off the field one game to get the shutdown corner they need so bad.

NY GIANTS +1.5 over Dallas

Fun fact #1: The Giants are terrible. Fun fact #2: Dallas is worse. And it’s December, so on with the Tomo Turnovers!

MIAMI +5 over New England

No one spoils the Pats strudel like the Fins at home.

Baltimore +3 over GREEN BAY

The Pack lost to the Buccaneers.