Many people often ask me, “What the hell is wrong with you?” Well, there are a myriad of answers to that particular question. Possibly I didn’t get enough attention as a child, maybe it stems from never wearing a helmet while trying to jump my neighbor’s Volvo with my bike, but more times than not, I’ve simply been drinking. I don’t know. Some days I black out and wake up in strange places like Mt. Rushmore or Christmas Tree farms.

What’s my point?

Well National Lampoon gave me my own podcast called The Douche Reportand it’s now available on itunes. It’s like all my articles, but in talking form. See dear reader, I’m making it easier on you! You don’t even have to read anymore! I’ll do it for you! Isn’t America great! And it’s only 15 minutes long, so you don’t have to concentrate that long! Happy days are here again!

The Douche Report is great to listen to while driving to work, driving home from work, at work (no swearing in it), driving to a place you don’t work, on an airplane, in your meth lab, right before your band goes on at Chuck E Cheese, out in the yard while you pump iron with your cell mate, while holding up an ice cream truck, or on a bus that is unbeknownst to you, is going to a Christmas Tree farm, far from your place of work or residence.

This episode I make NASCAR better by introducing a new way of looking at driving. And that new way is PCP. The drug, not the Precision Castparts Corp.

Enjoy and subscribe!*

http://twurl.nl/hjok6v

* podcast may cause nightblindness and feline diabetes