In an experiment for Sports Science, three-time major winning golfer Padraig Harrington recently attempted the Happy Gilmore swing – wherein one runs and slap shots the golf ball. Harrington was amazed when the swing added an extra 30 yards to his drive.

Sure, the swing is a breach of classic golf etiquette, inaccurate, and potentially dangerous to the spine. But this momentous outcome has the sports world excited. What other movies hold golden opportunities for the real world of sports?

The Flying V – The Mighty Ducks

I suggest the Anaheim Ducks drop behind the net, move into formation, and start the play that conquered not only the Hawks, but also Team Iceland. Too bad the move is totally illegal. The players in front of the V are using interference, and the move is absolutely off sides.

The Triple Lindy – Back To School

In this movie, Rodney Dangerfield performs the legendary Triple Lindy, the toughest move in all of diving. He climbs to the highest diving platform. He jumps to a middle springboard, then back flips to a lower springboard, then side flips to another springboard, then backflips onto the same platform, then performs a triple flip dive into the water. I want to see Alexandre Despatie, silver medalist from Canada, pull this off, and see if he still don’t get no respect.

The Floater – Rookie Of The Year

To begin, a child is playing professional baseball. Secondly, we are led to believe that his broken arm reforms into a pitching machine. But thirdly, we learn that if you want to defeat the greatest batter in all of baseball, just toss him a slow, floating, softball type throw. He’ll lick his lips, and totally miss it. Take notes, Randy Johnson, this works every time.

Iron Lotus – Blades Of Glory

A move so dangerous it can cut off a person’s head. This kind of danger may be just the thing to get me to watch the Winter Olympics.

Annexation of Puerto Rico – Little Giants

Rick Moranis’s rag tag team against Ed O’Neill’s Cowboys – and the game is tied with moments left. The nerdy kid “invents” the ultimate play, in which they run 99 yards with three different ball carriers for a touchdown. Ed O’Neill correctly identifies this trick play as “Fumblerooski,” invented by John Heisman, in which the quarterback intentionally fumbles the ball. I’d suggest more teams use this, except its no longer allowed in high school, college, or the NFL.

Have A Dog Play – Air Bud

Perhaps what the Clippers need is a dog who is trained to make baskets. Remember, the rulebooks never implicitly state that dogs are not allowed to play. This plan worked for the basketball team in Air Bud. And football in Air Bud: Golden Receiver. And for soccer in Air Bud: World Pup. And for baseball in Air Bud: Seventh Inning Fetch. And for volleyball in Air Bud: Spikes Back. And for space in Space Buddies.

Turn Into A Wolf – Teen Wolf

If your high school basketball team has a losing record, just turn one of your players into a wolf man, and he can front flip dunk. Too long has America forgotten this amazing way to win games. Good thing MTV is adapting the classic movie into a TV show. I wish I was kidding.

Stretch Your Arm Out Really Far – Space Jam

Michael Jordan discovers he can stretch himself out ridiculously far in the toon world, so he actually dunks from the half court line, stomping on Monstars in the process. Michael Jordan also discovered he couldn’t act or play basketball around the same time.

Pray – Angels In The Outfield

If, say, the Cleveland Indians ever want to win a world series, they should get a kid in a foster home to pray to God. Then Christopher Lloyd and his merry band of angels will effectively cheat on behalf of God.